The Strange People That You Can Only See In Walmart

No matter who you are, no matter where you live, there will undoubtedly be a Walmart near you. For some reason, Walmart seems to attract characters that wouldn't exist pretty much anywhere else in the world. These are the People of Walmart...

Like Father Like... Offspring

Someone might want to let this dad know that he should get some DNA tests. These don't look like his kids, mostly because they don't even look like kids. The next time someone asks if you were raised in a barn, just show them this picture. 

Open-Toed Sportswear

From the beach to the court, these kicks have it all baby. Plus, this person that's wearing them has the sickest fit going on too. All white with the baby blue accents, this is true Walmart chic.  

Fake It Till You Make It

Not everybody is telling the truth when they grab one of those scooters. But, we think that is totally fine as long as they don't care about the judgment they'll get. Honestly, some people would really benefit from having a mobile step stool like this. 

Bring Your Dog to the Store Day

We see no problem with this lady bringing her cute puppers into Walmart with her. The only criticism that we have is a bit more surface level. Who decides to wear open-toed shoes to Walmart? That's like walking into a construction site without wearing a hardhat. 

Growing a Tail

There aren't enough words in the dictionary to describe how impressed we are. Well, impressed and terrified. That dread probably smells so bad they had to evacuate the entire store. 

Just Taking the Turtle for a Walk

If you can bring a dog into a store, why can't you bring a turtle? Emotional support animals can come in all shapes and sizes. Specifically, the can come in round shelled sizes with small heads. 

M.J. Sighting

For everyone who thought that Michael Jackson didn't die, you may be right. However, instead of going to that cool island that everyone thinks Elvis is on, he just moved to Maryland. Evidently, Paris Hilton lives there too. 

The Tables Have Turned

Moms deserve a break sometimes. Parenting is tiring, and there's no shame in letting the kids pull their own weight for a little bit. Look! This kid is even getting a good workout in. This mom should be praised instead of being put on blast. 

J-Pree-An-Torts

It looks like this lady took the denim from the center of her boot cut jeans and donated it to her daughter. We respect this style more than many other styles, and you should too if you call yourself a true American. This lady looks ready to hop out of church right onto her horse. 

No Fitting Room? No Problem.

Listen, you never want to buy the wrong size of anything. It's not that much work to return it, we understand, but it's work nonetheless. If you have no shame, this should be a no-brainer. 

Just Chillin'

Do you know those little containers of hand wipes that stores have started placing next to the plastic bags for produce? The wipes are for this specific reason. You must clean your nasty body off after you cover yourself in pork chops. 

Back to the Cult

This dude is either a cult leader or a member of the local Amish society. We are leaning more towards the former. Cult leaders gotta eat too!

Nothing to See Here, Move Along

Have you ever seen the movie Ratatouille? Who said that could only be done by a rat? All the animal has to do is pull some hair. That can be achieved by any animal with anything that could possibly resemble thumbs. 

F-Uggs

There are a lot of things that you can fake in this world, but Uggs boots definitely aren't one of those things. Have they even sold a leather boot before? This person should have done their research before trying to pull a fast one like this. 

Just Prepping for the Day

To tell you the truth, this is a pretty bold move. There's no reason that this person shouldn't be able to comfortably go purchase their breakfast before taking off their facemask. We applaud their boldness and wish we had the same confidence to do something like that. 

Always Watching

While the motives behind this tattoo are technically unknown, we can assume that this is a dad who is "always watching." If you're going bald, why not just tattoo your head? It's like having hair, but a bit more fun. 

Business Up Top, Party Down Low

When they said it was casual Tuesday at the office, James went a little nuts. However, there is nothing casual about the sheer number of gallons of iced tea that this dude has in his cart. Seriously, this is a borderline public health risk. 

Express Yourself Everywhere

Completely ignore what this person is wearing. Whatever they decide to wear in public is entirely their business and not yours. Instead, focus on the real focal point here. Is this person floating?

Only On Planet Walmart

Before we pass any judgments, let's think about the scenario here. Doesn't it look a little toasty out? Maybe this guy is going right from the construction site to the beach. That's all we got. 

It's Called Fashion Sweetie

Outside of the pure sin that is cutting off orange tag Levis, this outfit is certified fire. You could honestly catch outfits like this on the Paris runway. Most of you are too scared to let your true colors show. 

Iggy Pop... Is That You?

Is this Iggy Pop? This could very well be the legendary frontman of The Stooges carting around his emotional support ferret. Compared to what he did in the past, this is pretty tame. 

It's Not a Phase, Mom

Harley Quinn is in this year. Maybe this was around Halloween and this person was trying on costumes? At least, that's what we hope was going on. 

Low Rise

You might think that this is a low-class person who just feels like wearing their shorts below their waist, but we're giving them the benefit of the doubt. We think that this dude is the captain of the Walmart gymnastics team and this outfit is just gym shorts over a leotard. You may be laughing now, but when this person wins Olympic gold, the script may flip.

Hi-Vis is in Nowadays

We know the type when we see it. This person is just another wannabe fashion week hopeful that has nowhere to strut their stuff but the public eye. We give this outfit a 3/10 for boldness only. 

Might Want to Hit the First Aid Aisle...

Sheesh, that doesn't even look like a sunburn at this point. Instead of checking out the cooler aisle, you should be probably be checking out the nearest hospital. Hopefully, your friends know where that is, because when you pass out from dehydration, that's where you're going to have to go. 

Sucking It in

It is extremely uncool to make fun of someone for their appearance. So instead, we're gong to make fun of this lady's footwear choice. Who in their right mind walks out of the house in Nike slides without socks? 

Plunging for Greatness

There are a myriad of appropriate uses for toilet plungers. These include, but are not limited to, the actions present in this here photo. Follow the lead of these here creative individuals. 

Mom and Her Monkey

There is something about southern mothers with ponytails and loving monkeys that normal society will never understand. Do not belittle this woman for her decisions. If you could have a pet monkey, wouldn't you jump at the opportunity?

Gotta Start Somewhere

As the old allegory goes, we all put our pants on one leg at a time. What they allegory doesn't mention is actually pulling those pants up. Checkmate, this is normal behavior. 

Blue Up and Down

Is this a late member of France's record-breaking Smurf festival? Or is this person dressed as a blue Sour Patch Kid to celebrate single color packs or gummies coming out soon? The world may never know. 

What If I Read It More Than Once?

We are huge supporters of proud flatulence. However, you might want to think a little deeper about your clothing when you go out into public places if you're going to be exercising your right to fart around strangers. This could be a quick ticket to getting your butt kicked. 

How Do You Shop?

This literally cannot be a fashion statement. There is nothing "fashion" or "statement" about these nails. The only thing that these nails would be good for is getting you fired from a job. 

At Least It's Wearing a Diaper

We've gone through the wringer with what animals are acceptable to bring into a grocery store. Let's finalize this by saying, it is only okay to bring service animals into stores. Whether this was a service lamb or not is still up for debate. 

The Queen of Walmart

You may first see this woman at a Walmart, but the next time you see her, it's going to be on the big screen. This lady has what it takes to be a huge star. Just give it some time, you will get famous sweetie. 

On the Way to the Beach

Where else are you supposed to find sunscreen on such short notice? Shore towns like these thrive when there's a Walmart around. However, we hope they are following the "No Shoes, No Shirt, No Service" rule. 

Conga-Line

Are these individuals attached to one another? Is this a traffic jam? Will we ever find the answer to these questions? That is highly unlikely. 

Strut Your Stuff

There ain't nothing like a little alternative dress in the wintertime to keep your legs warm, but still show off your gym progress. More power to you, grandpa. If the person that took this picture had half the calves that you do, they would probably be wearing the same thing. 

Tag Team the Prize

It takes two to tango, and this kid is still way too young to win his own prize here. Before you pass any negative judgment on these parents, what do you think they'd be using a bouncy ball for? This is for their child, belief in humanity for once. 

Rat and the Tail

There is nothing wrong with growing a rat tail. sometimes this is the only hair that some people can grow. It's sad, but true in a lot of cases. It's best to keep it non-scummy though. 

Tails Out for Produce

There are a ton of negative things we can say here. But, to avoid assuming the worst about this person, allow us to pitch an alternative. Maybe this guy is a member of a  Sonic the Hedgehog theater group and was cast to play Tails in their upcoming production. Bet you didn't think of that one!

Can I Get a Price Check?

We are unsure if you're going to be able to return this child without a receipt. However, we are willing to offer you a 50% value in-store credit. Does that work for you?

50% Cotton 

This lady is at the customer service desk to discuss these pants she got on 50% clearance. While she was excited about the half-off deal, she didn't realize that literally meant "half-off." We are unsure what the outcome of this situation will end up being. 

The Easter Man

This is the guy that hides the easter eggs in everyone's back yard. Very few individuals get to see him, for he does not usualy go out during the day. However, if you are lucky enough, you be able to catch him in his natural habitat. 

Makeshift Quarantine Mask

Please remember that plastic bags are not effective in protecting from any sort of airborne virus. They are not effective respirators, nor are they good for your health. This person should be advised to remove the plastic bag from their child's head. 

Picking a Winner

Picture this. You're in line to pay for your stuff. You have a wedgie, but your hands are full. There is no shame in asking for a little help every once in a while. 

That's Not How That Goes...

It's not that difficult to put your shirt on the correct way in the morning. However, who decides whether a shirt is on the "right" way? At the end of the day, your wardrobe is all personal expression, there is no need to worry about what people think of you depending on what you're wearing. 

Preordering My Games

A great way to go about buying games is to show up wearing the costume the character in your game wears. This will completely cut out the middle man. No more fiddling or questioning for the person at the desk, this will be a clean transaction with minimal confusion. 

Free is Free

Why would you spend several hundred dollars on a Wii when you can just go to Walmart and play for free? Grab your matching clothes partner and bowl for an afternoon for free. There are no downsides to this whatsoever.

They've Got No Evidence

Whatever crime this dude committed was probably a setup. There is no way that this man could have stolen anything or done anything wrong. Just look at him, he's naked. 

Push to Win

Clearly, this photo is satire. That is, unless this baby can actually push a full-grown man with a cart full of groceries to the checkout. The cart is on wheels, so who knows?

Just Picking Up Some Things

The hardest part of having a wedding is finding a photographer. Sometimes it's just easier and more cost-effective to do it yourself. We salute this couple and all others who are tying the knot on a budget. 

You Heard the Mom

This should never have to be said in any context. but please do not ever touch someone else's baby. At least, do not touch their baby without that person's explicit permission. Especially nowadays, just don't reach for anyone's child at all. 

On His Way to the Marathon

Here's a scenario. This guy is training for the semi-annual business-casual half marathon in his local small town. He wanted to stop into Walmart in between training sessions to purchase one single gallon of water. He is enjoying his life to the fullest. 

Two For One Special

Both of these fellas are exercising their right to dress exactly how they please. However, not wearing shoes in Walmart is practically a death sentence. Good luck with your athlete's foot and broken glass cuts buddy, you're going to need it. 

That's a Good Deal

What do you think is going on here? Do you think this guy actually just wants to wrestle mother-in-laws? Or maybe he's practicing for some other wrestling event. The sky is the limit with this one. 

Woah there Buddy

There's no need to be rude. Put your head away buddy, there are kids around. If you see this guy in a Walmart near you, do him a favor and buy him one of those cheap hats. 

Just Grabbing a Quick Bite

Sometimes you get discharged from the hospital and only have a few things in your pantry. That's okay. There is nothing wrong with grabbing some bananas and toothpaste from Walmart on your way back home. 

The Paint Goblin

Every Walmart has a paint goblin. Keep your eyes peeled for any middle-aged man that's completely covered in whatever color spraypaint. This may seem like a normal human man, but you would be mistaken to assume that. 

From the Club to the Store

There are some upsides and some downsides to wearing these shoes in Walmart. For starters, you can now grab things on higher shelves than you could have before. On a downside, you might have just exposed your best fit to the public before you could stunt on a Friday night,. 

An Expensive Prank 

Covering someone's car in pads in the Walmart parking lot? Check. Making sure that it's the hottest day of the year so the adhesive from the pads melts onto the windows and sicks forever? Double c heck. Wasting $40 on a meaningless prank? Triple check. 

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The More You Know

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  • Mr. and Mrs. came from the words master and mistress.
  • More than 800 languages are spoken in Papua New Guinea.
  • A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time.

Post originally appeared on Upbeat News.