Mia Khalifa Reveals Truth Behind Adult Film That Destroyed Her Life

Fresh out of college and battling her worst insecurities, 21-year-old Mia Khalifa signed an adult film contract that would change her life forever. Three months later, she became one of the most popular faces in the world—but it nearly cost Khalifa her life.

The Rise and Fall of Mia Khalifa

Mia Khalifa was one of the first Lebanese women to work as a performer in the adult film industry. Although she only spent three months on camera, Khalifa's impact on the business lasted far beyond her brief time in the industry. It was all thanks to one controversial video...

Her Life Was Destroyed

Khalifa left the industry in 2015, but she remains one of the most popular adult film stars. Nearly a year after her departure, Khalifa remained the most highly-searched adult actress of 2016. Although she only made adult films for a few months, Khalifa's breakout scene landed her in hot water with a dangerous terrorist organization. Her life was turned upside-down by this dubious decision...

Fleeing Lebanon

Mia Khalifa, also known as Mia Callista, was born and raised in Lebanon until the age of 10. Her family was devoutly Catholic and Khalifa described her home as "very conservative." She learned to speak English at a French private school in Beirut before moving to the United States with her family in the wake of the South Lebanon conflict. Khalifa's American high school experience was far from ideal...

Living in Fear

Khalifa immigrated to Maryland in 2001, where she attended high school. Khalifa was bullied by her peers for being "the darkest and weirdest girl there." Her tormentors only escalated in cruelty after the September 11 attacks. Eventually, in an effort to keep their daughter safe, Khalifa's parents sent her to military school. Most teenagers would resent the experience, but Khalifa defied the odds...

Thriving in Private

In military school, Khalifa was no longer under her parents' watchful eye. She described it as the first place where she really felt free. In public school, Khalifa had been branded "the terrorist," which she said was a derogatory term used to belittle anyone of Indian, Middle Eastern, or Pakistani descent. Khalifa began to question the pride in her Lebanese heritage...

Slipping Confidence

Despite the bullying she endured, Khalifa believes it forced her a grow a thick skin. By the time she left for college, Khalifa described herself as "pretty overweight," which left her feeling extremely vulnerable. Unfortunately, Khalifa would soon have to deflect much uglier insults hurled her way...

Seeking Validation

Khalifa attended the University of Texas-El Paso, where she studied history and managed to graduate a year early. Fresh out of school with a Bachelor's degree in History, Khalifa decided to double down on transforming her body, which had been a source of insecurity her whole life...

Weight Loss

By sticking to a strict diet and exercise regimen, Khalifa was able to shed fifty pounds. She put herself through school by working odd jobs—modeling, bartending, and even a brief appearance on a Spanish gameshow as a "briefcase girl." Still, despite her personal success, Khalifa still didn't feel confident in her own skin. Then, she moved to Miami, where she was approached with an interesting offer...

Under the Knife

Although Khalifa's weight loss was ultimately a good thing, she had to suffer the consequences. By the time she moved to Miami, she was left with loose skin and breasts that she felt looked "deflated." Khalifa traveled to Beverly Hills, where the post-grad underwent breast augmentation surgery. After Khalifa recovered, she felt better than ever—but her new body had become the subject of scrutiny.

Male Validation

For the first time in her life, Khalifa was receiving attention from men. Prior to the weight loss and subsequent surgery, she had hidden her body beneath baggy clothing, but the procedure had given her the confidence to start wearing whatever she wanted. At first, Khalifa loved the validation, but it began to impact her self-esteem...

Unexpected Offer

One day, while walking around a strip mall in Miami, Khalifa was approached by a man who told the young woman that she was absolutely gorgeous. He asked if she had ever considered nude modeling. Khalifa was surprised, but she accepted his business card, saying she needed to sit on the idea for a few weeks...

Poor Self-Image

Khalifa was in a particularly vulnerable position. She was still adjusting to her new body and all the attention that came with it. Before she became confident in herself, Khalifa depended on men to validate her worth. "I didn’t know what I looked like and I didn’t know or value my self-worth," Khalifa said, "and instead I left it up to men to tell me what my self-worth was."

In the end, Khalifa decided to take a walk on the wild side...

Diving In

Khalifa was expecting the worst, but when she arrived at the facility, she was pleasantly surprised. It seemed like a clean, perfectly normal-looking office filled with mostly women. The modeling went well—Khalifa felt safe and was showered with compliments the entire time. That's when she was met with an unexpected proposition...

She Couldn't Turn Back

Khalifa was asked if she would be interested in doing pornography. At the time, she was only 21 years old. She admitted that she was still grappling with low self-esteem. For two weeks, Khalifa mulled over the idea before she "made the mistake of saying yes and going in," she later said to Lance Armstrong during a podcast interview. Khalifa never could have predicted what would happen in those three short months...

She Thought Wrong

Khalifa didn't think it was possible for her videos to be easily found online; she didn't have any social media back then. She ended up moving forward and signing a contract. Within months, she would become one of the most popular adult performers in history, but the fame was far from what Khalifa had imagined...

Mixed Emotions

After performing in her first scene, Khalifa said she felt a combination of guilt, shame, emptiness, and "validated for a whole twenty minutes." Although everyone on-set tried their best to make her feel comfortable, the experience was deeply nerve-wracking. Khalifa felt distant from herself physically and emotionally while performing. Soon, the facade began to crack...

Going Viral

As her videos picked up steam, Khalifa began receiving messages from friends and acquaintances who had recognized her through her adult films. Khalifa soon realized that everyone had witnessed this side of her, whether she liked it or not. The numbers climbed, and Khalifa continued to perform, despite the emotional toll it was taking on her...

The Scene That Changed It All

Everything came to a head when Khalifa's producers suggested a provocative turn from her usual scenes. Because of her Lebanese heritage, the producers wanted Khalifa to don a hijab, thinking the controversial choice would bring in more views. They were right—but it almost cost Khalifa her life...

Feeling Uneasy

"You motherf***ers are going to get me killed!" she said, but the producers laughed in her face. Khalifa was only partially joking. She knew that it was a terrible idea, but she figured that people would understand that the film was meant to be satire. Unfortunately, things spiraled out of control...

Her Life Was in Danger

The hijab scene raked in over 1.5 million views from around the world. Khalifa was torn apart by the Lebanese and Middle Eastern media. Her parents found out and condemned her line of work. Khalifa didn't realize that her Twitter was linked to her geolocation—somebody screenshot a photo of her apartment and said, "I know where you live." Khalifa even received death threats from the most notorious terrorist organization on earth...

Threatened by ISIS

Khalifa's hijab scene had even reached the likes of the known terrorist organization ISIS, who threatened her with a violent photoshopped image. She tried not to take the threats too seriously, but the idea of being targeted by such a dangerous group still terrified her. Suddenly, everyone was searching for Khalifa's videos. Khalifa had trouble coping with the media frenzy, which shamed her for her choices...

Scared for Her Life

Khalifa was disowned by her family because of the video. In the midst of the chaos, Khalifa's home address was made public, forcing her to move into a hotel until everything blew over. She was no longer under any illusions about the adult film industry. The negative attention opened her eyes to the impact her career had on her friends, family, and relationships...

Hypocrisy

Despite the backlash, searches for the 22-year-old's pornography reached impossible heights in areas like Lebanon, Syria, and other parts of the Middle East. She called the reaction hypocritical. The popularity wasn't validating for Khalifa. In fact, it was anything but. By January 2015, much to the chagrin of the executives, Khalifa voided her contract and stepped away from the industry altogether.

"It didn't validate me. Nothing like that ever does," Khalifa said. "That's not what you should be doing to try to build your self-esteem."

Dealing With the Aftermath

 While some people were threatening Khalifa with execution, others supported her. British-Lebanese author Nasri Atallah said that he believed Khalifa was "free to do as she pleases with her body." Khalifa confessed that although she was certainly indulging in her rebellious phase, she no longer wished to be "Mia Khalifa, the famous porn star." From the start, earning popularity was never Khalifa's intention...

She Was Totally Abandoned

In the wake of the incident, Khalifa expressed her disappointment with her home country. What she once viewed as the most Westernized area in the Middle East had become, to Khalifa, a "devastatingly archaic and oppressed" nation. For Khalifa, porn wasn't about money or celebrity status. Khalifa was simply seeking validation at a point in her life where she felt alienated from herself.

Far From a "Millionaire"

Along with the malice Khalifa faced from friends and strangers alike, people started to conflate Khalifa speaking about her own experiences in the industry with a criticism of the industry at large. She was accused of being "ungrateful" for the money, fame, and attention, even though Khalifa never wanted either of those things in the first place. In fact, Khalifa had only been paid $12,000 in total for her videos and never saw a penny of the revenue earned from the millions of streams.

A Difficult Choice

Khalifa made it her goal to transition into a more "normal" career, but it wasn't easy. In order to make ends meet, she linked her adult scenes in her social media profiles, allowing her to earn money while searching for employment elsewhere. She was scared that the gap in her resume would impede her from reentering the workforce. Fortunately, one small company took her on...

Adjusting to Reality

Her first job after she left the industry was working as a paralegal at a small attorney's ofice in Miami. When a male coworker said that he recognized her, and Khalifa felt extremely uncomfortable. "After the whole high from feeling validated by porn wore off, I immediately began to feel ashamed when a man looked at me a certain way," she said.

It wasn't long until Khalifa moved on to better things—including the man she would eventually marry.

Starting Over

Khalifa moved to Austin, Texas, where she began to pursue her real interest: sports. Khalifa had always loved sports, and she was able to transform that passion into a career. Khalifa became a social media personality, webcam model, and sports commentator. She hosted a variety of sports commentary shows on YouTube and RoosterTeeth. After she left an industry that proved toxic to her happiness, Khalifa found a loving partner who made her life feel truly complete...

Cooking up a Romance

Over time, Khalifa became interested in food and cooking. On her YouTube channel, she would cook dishes requested by her subscribers. Her newfound expertise in the kitchen ended up leading her into the arms of someone who would change her life for the better. She started following Swedish chef Robert Sandberg because he was recommended to her via the Michelin Instagram page...

Happily Ever After

The two began an online relationship which lasted over a period of several months. The first time she went to Stockholm to visit Sandberg, she tried on a ring at a jewelry store as a joke. He remembered the design and had it custom-made for her. Sandberg proposed during a beautiful dinner in Chicago. Khalifa didn't see it coming, but she was beyond overjoyed. She ended up leaving her home in Austin for one last adventure...

Together Forever

The pair moved to Los Angeles together where Khalifa was thrilled to start a life with him. "I can't believe how fast this last year has gone by and how much has changed, but I never in my life thought I'd say I'm excited to move to LA," she wrote on Instagram. "Probably because I'm just excited to start building a life and home with this treasure of a man, and where in the world I do it doesn't matter (even if it's LA), as long as I have him, and his Swedish pancakes on Sunday mornings."

Khalifa had it all. By then, years had passed since the scene that upended her life. She was finally ready to tackle one last obstacle...

Speaking Out

Working in the pornographic film industry meant that Khalifa no longer maintained any semblance of privacy. In the span of three months, Khalifa's entire life was on display. Now, at the age of 26, Khalifa wants to let others struggling in the industry know that they're not alone.

Recognizing the Truth

Khalifa recognized that the industry targeted women with low self-esteem. She had been in a position of vulnerability and succumbed to manipulative contracts and pressure from producers and executivies. Khalifa has gone on to suggest legal reforms to help people who may be in similar positions...

Making A Difference

Khalifa wants to prohibit recruiters from approaching girls on the street in order to make sure that anyone who becomes involved in the industry is doing so of their own volition. She also wants to change the way that contracts are presented to young people who may not have legal representation.

Khalifa's attempts to reform the adult film industry are direct results of her own traumatic experience as a young woman in the public eye. Although she has grown from the experience, Khalifa understands the consequences of her former career.

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Post originally appeared on Upbeat News.